WHEN Colin Arnott and Trisha Rankin sat down to plan their wedding, they quickly reached an impasse with the traditional options. Lacking firm religious beliefs, they rejected a church service as hypocritical. A civil ceremony, on the other hand, struck them as impersonal and bureaucratic.

It was only when they discovered humanism – with an emphasis on moral and ethical values without recourse to religion – that it seemed right. However, the couple, who come from Glasgow and now live and work in Edinburgh, first came across humanism at a funeral.

"It might sound gloomy," says Colin, a 27-year-old property man-ager, "but the celebrant at the funeral explained the ideas behind humanism and they seemed to fit in with our own beliefs and values." The service, held two years ago, made a similarly profound impression on Trisha, also 27, who works as a fraud officer at the Royal Bank of Scotland. "The celebrant gave the ceremony a personal touch and there was a lot of comfort in his voice."

Trisha and Colin are among an increasing number of couples turning to humanism as a way of lending gravitas to occasions over which organised religions have traditionally held sway. Since they started keeping records in 1998, the Humanist Society of Scotland has noted a tenfold increase in the number of funerals it has presided over, with around 1800 conducted last year. A total of 85 weddings were held last year and 300-400 are expected to take place this year.

Permission to have a humanist wedding was granted to Scots in June last year after a landmark ruling by the registrar-general conceded that barring them could infringe upon couples' human rights. Despite humanists reporting a similar demand south of the border, Scotland is still the only place in the UK where such ceremonies are legal.

On numbers alone, humanism might appear to be a minnow swimming in a much bigger nuptial pool. There are 30,000-plus marriages held in Scotland each year, one-third of which are conducted by the Kirk or Catholic Church. But humanism has grown to the extent that it now rivals smaller established religions, such as the Baptist Union of Scotland, United Free Church and United Reformed Church, in the number of services conducted.

Ivan Middleton, secretary of the Humanist Society of Scotland, says the philosophy has filled a gap left between traditional weddings and civil ceremonies, one that dates back to 1837 when the latter were first officially sanctioned. But, unlike religious services where couples seek the blessing of the church and God, couples choosing a humanist celebrant do so for varied reasons.

Those who approach Middleton asking him to conduct weddings include "part-time Christians" who would previously have had a religious wedding for appearances' sake. "Quite a lot of ministers are pleased about that," says Middleton. "People come along to them and say 'can you marry us, but take it easy on the God bit?' The minister can say 'do you know about the humanists? They're maybe more for you'."

The ceremonies can also appeal to couples from different religious backgrounds whose families have difficulty agreeing which faith should preside. "In these cases, we can provide common ground," he says. Divorcees seeking to celebrate a wedding without feeling guilt or the need to seek forgiveness have also opted for humanism instead of a religious service, he adds.

A major difference between humanist and civil weddings is in the freedom to choose the venue. Although the Marriage Act (Scotland) 2002 allowed for a civil ceremony to be held outwith registry offices, the locations are still restricted to licensed premises, typically hotels and function rooms. By contrast, humanists are free to conduct services anywhere they deem safe and dignified.

The first official humanist wedding in Scotland, between Karen Watts and Martin Reijns, was held in Edinburgh Zoo on June 18 last year. Others have opted for equally unlikely locations – back gardens, converted churches and country fields.

Another attraction of the humanist ceremony is it can be tailored to individual wishes to a greater extent than it religious or civil counterpart. In preparation for their wedding in September, Trisha and Colin are preparing their own vows, a process they feel will add value to the words they say on the day.

Typically, the vows include a promise to love and care for each other, says Middleton. But they can also include more humorous asides. "I conducted one wedding where the man promised to make the bed in the way shown to him, using hospital corners," he said.

"Another man's vow was to allow his wife to add to her already extensive shoe collection. In return, she promised to allow him to play golf and watch sport on TV. That wouldn't suit everyone, of course.

I related this story to another bride and she immediately said 'there's no point making promises you can't keep'."

By contrast, couples seeking to have poetry readings or singing during civil wedding services have often found themselves falling foul of laws which place a strict ban on including material with a religious connotation. St Paul's biblical passage On love, Robbie Williams's song Angels and the poetry of Kahil Gibran have proved popular with atheists, but are usually barred from non-religious ceremonies.

Though still a relatively small phenomenon, the humanist wedding appears to have potential to expand among Scottish secularists. The Humanist Society recently applied to double the number of officially registered celebrants operating from 12 to 24 to cope with the new workload. However, Paul Parr, deputy-registrar general for Scotland, could only license a further eight people, arguing that the numbers should be limited in relation to the society's membership. Though this presents a temporary headache for celebrants with bustling diaries – especially in the Lothians and Highlands – Middleton is optimistic about the long-term trend.

"Every time we conduct a wedding, the couple automatically become members of the society so membership is going up," he says. "We're also gaining a younger membership, which is in stark contrast to the declining and ageing congregations that churches are seeing across Scotland." The roots of a healthy future for humanism have already been laid.

For weddings and a funeral

Weddings:

• The service must be conducted by an official humanist celebrant. There are 12 in Scotland but the Humanist Society of Scotland plans to register a further eight.
  


• The location for humanist weddings is decided by the couple, but must be approved by the celebrant. The location must be safe and dignified.
  


• As with civil and religious weddings, humanist ceremonies require a marriage schedule provided by the local registrar, which is signed by the couple, the celebrant and two witnesses.

Funerals:

• Around 1800 humanist funerals were held in 2005.
  


• An element of humour is often injected, but the content of the service depends to a great extent on the people organising it.
  


• There are currently 50 celebrants registered to conduct funeral services across Scotland.

For further details, and contacts for individual celebrants, see www.humanism-scotland.org.uk or email secretary@humanism-scotland.org.uk